Family Matters

One of the hardest things about following God to another country is the distance it brings  between me and my parents.  I am an only child.  I have their only 2 grandchildren.

I have had 2 babies in Belgium, my mom was here for one of the two births.  I have lost 3 grandparents while living overseas and wasn’t able to be there for any of the funerals.  I have also lost 2 babies and my mom wasn’t here to hold my hand.  The girls have had normal sicknesses and gone through the chickenpox and there was no family to help.  And in these moments the distance grows and often loneliness threatens to set in.

On Sunday, January 12, I woke up to a WhatsApp message from my mom telling me that my dad was in the hospital.  Fluid had been building up in his body and he finally agreed to see a doctor.  He had heart problems years ago, heart attack and open heart surgery.  And my mom and I had been trying to self-diagnosis, through Dr. Google, the fluid build up and decided it was because about 5 years ago the doctors said that he was borderline diabetic.  We were wrong.

He spent about 5 days in the hospital where they ended up taking out 6.5 liters of fluid! They said he has congestive heart failure and probably more importantly, he has non-alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver…it appears to be shrinking.  Since then, he has had several doctors appointments in several different cities.  And he is currently in the middle of many different kinds of tests after seeing the liver specialist last week.

I am trying to figure out what I need to do from the other side of the ocean.  I hate that my mom has to take care of my dad all by herself…while holding down a full time job.  And of course, when he needed to see one doctor in a different city, their water pump stopped working (because they live in a small town and still have a well).  And then the as the other out of town doctor’s appointment approached, their heaters in the living area went out.  One problem after the other.

I did talk my mom into buying her first GPS to make driving to all the different doctors less stressful.  And I crocheted my first afghan and sent it as a warm hug. I sent my mom a Starbucks e-card so she could take care of herself and have a break when she needed it.  I am thankful to Wal-Mart’s next day delivery that lets me order “low salt” snacks and a warm blanket for my dad.

The problem is that Dr. Google doesn’t have anything good to say about my dad’s health, even though the doctors are being cautious with their words.  But I assume that last November’s trip to Belgium could have been my dad’s last flight overseas.  I have had to talk to the girls about the seriousness of “Paw-Paw’s” health.

Right now I just want to do what I can. I want to know when or if I need to make a trip to the States (and is it even a good idea in the middle of the coronavirus panic).  I want my mom to feel my support and love over our WhatsApp conversations.

It’s not always easy following Jesus.  So I pray for His lead in this moment…in every moment.

Ministry House

We silently passed the 1 year anniversary since we bought the ministry house here in Antwerp.  Our first service was held on April 7, so I am planning on celebrating that day with the church.

At one point, I thought that once we bought the building, the stress would be over.  But last May, I got in touch with the fire inspectors just to make sure we were all in order.  I want to make sure we have a good standing in the city.  Well, unknown to me, with the fire inspector also comes the building inspector.  On that day in May, we found out that although we passed fire inspection, we had to get a new permit on the building to operate a Christian ministry legally.

I investigated and was told that we could continue with our services without a problem, but the building inspector was obligated to get the police involved and suddenly my name became known.

I enlisted my sweet Belgian friend to help with the process since Dutch is not my first language.  She is literally a God-send.  And together we began to sort through hundreds of pages!!! to fill out the request for a new permit.

In December, I was called into the police via a letter that threatened jail time if I didn’t show up.  After much prayer, that meeting went better than we could have imagined.

However, our biggest obstacle is the permit office in Antwerp.  We have been told by the last church to go through the process that it will take us over 2 years and in the end we will need an architect and a lawyer…and literally a miracle to win.

So again, we pray!  I have asked God to not let it get to the province level.  I don’t want to hire a lawyer.  I have prayed with the faith of a mustard seed that the mountain that stands against churches in the city will be moved from here to there.  And after sending the wrong email to the absolutely wrong person in the city office, I prayed that my mistake will work together for our good from Romans 8:28.

Last Tuesday we had another long awaited meeting with the city official in charge of permits.  The meeting had been postponed because of our kids’ illnesses.  After waiting 3 weeks for a new meeting time,  I woke up on Tuesday morning and realized quickly that Maria-Grace had a fever.  I called my friend walking through this process with me…what should I do? She said her first grade daughter was also sick.

I knew immediately it was spiritual warfare.  And we were still going to that meeting.  We planned on taking the girls with us (even with the coronavirus scare) and a beautiful mom at school volunteered to take them home with her!  So we waited on the bus…and it didn’t come.  So we walked (quickly) for 3.3 kms and checked in for our meeting on time at exactly 10:00 am!!

We were called into the official’s office.  The meeting started off a little tense and by the end of the hour he gave us hope.  He said it would all be okay and that we don’t even need a permit.  We have a couple of hurdles to jump through…(more work). Today, we learned that the office with the photos needed, is closed for the next month because they are moving and the other office needs a ton of paperwork (that hopefully we already have).  And then we need to hire an architect.  But he (the one with the power) promised it would all be okay in the end.  He even said the city needed people like us here! Hallelujah!! But we continue to pray for this last leg of the race!

There is light and we are still learning to breathe and literally cast our cares on God…because that’s what He commands.  We can feel Him working and we are grateful!

The Virus, Young People and Random Stuff

I can’t believe that I haven’t written anything yet this year…2020.  We are already in March and time has passed too quickly.  There have been many times I have thought, “I really need to write that” and just haven’t sat down to do it.  So this the random stuff blog post.

The coronavirus is what everyone is talking about these days in Europe.  Belgium is a tiny country, one of the world’s smallest.  So at one point last week we only had 1 person infected with the virus and as of today, there are 239.  Our neighbors, France and Germany, are much larger countries and have over 1,000 known people who are infected.

We are not a country of hand sanitizers but most of the shelves are empty of antibacterial soaps.  There doesn’t seem to be a grocery store panic.  The country has moved out of the moderate risk to high risk zone and that means the government has the legal right to close down schools and cinemas (public gathering places) if necessary.

We aren’t too worried about it…we still want to live.  So we wash our hands more and trust Jesus to keep us safe.  But as the girls have suffered from low grade temperatures, sniffles and coughs, we are aware of the reality the world is currently in.

Even with the coronavirus threat, we haven’t shut the church doors.  In fact, Saturday, I hosted and organized our first ever Young People day at the ministry house.  Our non-profit, Christ for all Nations, currently has 3 churches and 2 Bible study groups in the country.  None of them are large, so we invited young people from all over to join us.  We had around 30 who spent the day together, playing games, eating spaghetti, worshipping, studying the Bible and talking in conversation groups.

It was a wonderful time of getting to know one another better.  We wanted them to feel loved, heard, known.  And so many said they were so glad they came.  Our goal is to gather once a month together.  It’s good for our souls.

I found out that UNO and Jenga are wonderful games for them to play.  I also heard them say that being a third culture kid in church is hard.  Following Jesus in 2020 is not the easy way.  Growing up in the west and born in the Middle East is difficult.  And I found my heart growing immensely for this age group in the Arabic churches.

By the time the young people’s day was over and the prayer meeting after that, I found myself exhausted.  I work and live in 4 languages and sometimes that is just a mental workout and I feel worn out at the end of the day.

Finding a quiet moment to recover is important to me.  So by Sunday afternoon, I curled up on our bed and listened to the rain hitting our roof as I read the new John Eldredge book, Get Your Life Back.  That is exactly what my soul is craving!

Have you ever just felt like the world is going by too fast and you can’t even breathe? I do…all the time.  My shoulders feel weighted down from carrying the world, my world, there.  And this book reminds me to breathe.  Take that extra breath with God.  Reconnect.

In fact, Eldredge made an app…you can find it by searching “John Eldredge One Minute Pause”…it’s free.  It has beautiful scenery and soothing music along with Bible verses and reminders to breathe.  You can have 1, 3, 5 or 10 minute pauses and reminders in the morning and afternoon.  Reconnecting with God in the busyness of it all is so important.

It’s crazy, but while the rest of the world has to be reminded to wash their hands, I just need that reminder from God to…breathe.